So what did I do this weekend???
Friday: Took Diva to my parents house to spend some time with them and to allow her mother (ME!) to restore some patience and sanity! My friend Lynard went with me! Anyway, long story short......we stopped in a Walgreens to empty our bladders. Inside the public "disasterous-disguisting-nasty" bathroom was a older lady mumbling to herself. Okay, I talk to myself often so I concentrate more on getting my spanx down and not peeing myself! I wait for Lynard to be done and at this time the lady comes out of the stall. She proceeds to tell us that today she ate broccoli and carrots for lunch and it makes her shit herself (she went into gross out details). Lynard and I giggle to amuse her and Lynard pushes me out the door! Then on our way home we run into fog! Really thick fog! I was passing a vehicle and there was a truck in front of the car I'm passing. This redneck decides to stop suddenly, turn in front of me so he can do a U-turn! Okay people.....our speed limit is 75miles and hour! Naturally I was doing 80! I screamed obsenities that deserved a mouthful of soap! I also do the motherly reaction and extend my arm in front of Lynard! Let's just say that if we were in an accident....her left boob would have been safe!!!
Saturday: Sat around and picked my butt all day! It was freezing ass cold out people! So cold your nostrils stick together and any snot freezes instantly! Sucks the big weiner I tell ya! I Hate Winter!!! AHHHHHHHH!
Sunday: It's still freezing but whatever. Meet my parents to eat lunch and then we all head to the skating rink! We (we being the PTO) decided to try to get all of the school district involved with a fun event! It worked! Over 150 people from our town! Awesome! What wasn't so awesome is my beautiful niece put her skates between mine while I was trying to help her. Note: I suck at skating anyway! So, both of us go down like big piles of goo! I proceed to push her up and then try to get my rump up too! This doesn't go so well. I end up falling on my ass again and my niece dropped on top of me again! Okay...round 2.......same thing! People....it took me 4 attempts! Thank God for the extra padding on my keister but damn......my ass hurts!!!! And might I add how flipping hard it is to try to hold up 2 + children!!!! Good Gracious.....I finally escorted them to the wall and told them to fend for themselves. They were like leeches!!!
Anyway, I have muscles in my body that hurt like hell right now and are on fire! I'm such a freaking wuss!!!! And I'm a wuss that is totally out of shape. You want to know what's worse??? My 60yr old father was skating circles around me! I tried tripping him but that old man was just way too fast!!!! Next time my friends.....Next time!!!! Vengance will be mine!!!
So, that was my weekend! I'm going to take a bottle of Tylenol PM and maybe go soak my body in hopes of some relief. I don't even want to think about tomorrow. Ouch......
Did anyone else watch Extreme Home Make Over tonight??? Man, that was a tear jerker!
Want a funny???? S
ure you do! You can't leave here without one, right???
ure you do! You can't leave here without one, right??? What a cheeser! This is something my hubby would do!
Later dudes!!!!
11 comments:
I'm sensing a pattern here...you're tired of winter. LOL Sorry it's so dang cold there! And that your hiney hurts. :-(
I think I have been on ice skates maybe once in my life. And I fell numerous things and vowed never again. Meanwhile my oldest took lessons, so I totally leave it up to her to teach her sisters how to skate while I freeze my ass off on the bleachers!
Yes, Home Makeover made me bawl tonight. Course, everything makes me bawl lately. Talk about being a wuss. Sheesh!
Love the pic!
Have your hubby rub your arse and take some drugs.
Hope you feel better in the morning.
Hey, I have that mom car accident reaction too...but you should see my passenger seat reactions - they are classic. Foot to the pretend brake? Check. Hand on the driver's arm, like that will do anything? Check. Hand on the ceiling? Check. Hehe.
Skating sounded like fun. Kind of!
Well, sorry to hear about your skating ouchies. Even though I had a fantastic fall at the beginning of the night, I felt great when I got home. Reminded me that exercising does make the body feel good. Just wish I could harness that power and keep it going!!! My hubby on the other hand whined like a baby that his left knee was sore. But, Mr. Not-So-Athletic was a good sport and really worked it on those skates. I swear he had the most fantastic falls of the night (hee, hee, hee!)!! I think I was able to make his knee feel better by the end of the night though!
My 14yr old and I enjoyed EHMO also last night, and we both got the sniffles. It was emotional!
I love Winter -to an extent- like maybe a week or two.
Thanks for stopping by! Love your "wiener" pic. How funny! My husband would totally do that too!
Hallie
It is negative 4 degrees here. i am tired too! LOL, so flipping tired. Thanks for the funny picture!
Ha!! The pops is skating circles around you. I'm sorry that I laughed so hard at the image of picking yourself up at the skating rink...but really, insert my ass into the image, and on roller skates, and we're there.
OMG that picture made me laugh out loud. Too too funny - poor bastard.
LMAO at the pic....oh those jalapenos make that wiener look a bit...um,...er,..infected :O
I hate it when snot freezes! It just makes it hurt more to pick it out, hehe :)
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