Wednesday, February 6, 2008

A platter of seriosness with a side of funny!

I'm going serious for a paragraph (or two)! Don't doesn't last long!

So, I've been reading some new blogs and I'm sad to report (and a twinge of happy that I'm so not alone) that there are some mom's suffering with panic attacks, anxiety disorders and depression! Why am I bringing this up! Well, partly because I'm having one of "those" days and so I need an outlet to vent and because I want others to know that if you are one of the unfortunate souls are so not alone! Plus, if you don't suffer I want to show you what this feels like! Just in case you know someone suffering but you really don't understand what's going on in their chemical inbalanced brain!

It is very disturbing! It is completly hindering and in stinks more then your diaper pail! You see, this runs in my blood anyway! My mom (whom is a wonderful, wonderful human being) suffers too! And just recently I was informed that my great grandmother was committed numerous times due to depression! I don't suffer from depression however, I walk the line at times! After numerous visits and crying sessions with my great doctor, it has been determined that my most current issues are a result of no hormones. I have no girly parts and I don't take a hormone replacement! So, my body and mind sort of retaliated and decided to screw with my head! There are days that I have cried non-stop, had severe muscle aches, heart fluttering moments to which I thought I was having a heart attack, chest tightness, on edge, moodiness, ticks (like constantly rubbing my face), etc. This is real friends and these were some of my darkest days ever! Thank the good Lord above that my hubby and family and friends are so, so supportive! However, guilt strangles them everyday too! They wonder if it is something they have done, they wonder if I'm not happy with my life and they try fiercly to fix it! They can't!

I am now on effexor! This very expensive med is working pretty good! It doesn't stop the anxiety all together however, I'm coping better. My friend Nickie (the Nickie who doesn't have a blog but needs to get one!) is a therapist and has suggested some other forms to helping me as well! I'm willing to give it a shot! So, if you have someone or you are the one who is suffering daily with to your doctor and insist that they help you! And under the advise of my therapist (that's you Nickie!) with a therapist, counselor, family group therapy sessions, etc! It's worth your time to get help!!!!

Alright, enough of the serious stuff! Ugh....that was boring, eh???

Now, I'm going to talk of my wonderful hubby! Us ladies always say that our hubby is like another child! Yeah, well.....I have proof! My daughter is a huge Webkinz fanatic! Do you know what Webkinz is?? You buy these little stuffed animals and then register them on the web and it's like a virtual pet! You enter the world of Webkinz! I admit...there are some fun games in this world! And keep in mind that you win money for your pet to buy them shelter, food, etc. My hubs plays on Webkinz more then Diva! Need proof! Ahhhh...say no more!
This particular picture was taking in a hotel room weeks ago!!! I could seriously think of a ton of other things we COULD have been doing at this time (more hotel sex maybe???) Do you know how many times I have yelled "Hubby, get off of Webkinz!" or "We have to go, get off of Webkinz NOW!"
Last night I had to run an errand! I called and asked him to do me a favor! Here is this conversation:
Me: "Can you add some music to my MP3 player"
Him: "Now??? I'm busy!"
Me: "Yes now, what are you doing?" (knowing full well what the man is doing! It's either scratching his balls or playing Webkinz!
Him: "Ummmm....I'm just busy!"
Me: "Your playing Webkinz....I know what your doing!"
Him: "I'm helping Diva with her homework too!" (okay, she was sitting on the couch next to him doing her homework while he played Webkinz!)
Me: "Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!"
He swears that he is only playing so he can make Diva lots of money for her Webkinz! Yeah right!
*Hon: I know your reading this right now as you can't stay away from my blog because you fret that I am going to tell some deep dark secret about you (BTW: My hubby has worn my undergarments!) ooppps....I guess I am going to tell a deep dark secret but nonetheless.....I know that you play Webkinz because you are a kid at heart and I know that you are shaking your head right now and rolling the ole' eyes to the back of your head but Y.O.U. cannot fool me sucka! And if you feel like retaliating against this blog I guess your only option is to get your own blog! And if you do get your own blog just know that I will trash it anyway! Got it mister??? So, I win....You lose! But just remember that I love you anyway and I think you are simply the best hubby in the world! Seriously, you are fun, caring, passionate, romantic, giving, sweet, exciting, fun, fun, fun! You make me smile and laugh and that is the best medicine you can give to your panic ridden psycho wife! Kisses Kisses.....Hugs Hugs you big turd!!!!
Linky love time!!!!
A Bun's life: A cool chicky momma who is loads of fun!
Jess: The cool lady who taught me how to hyperlink like this!
OhMommy: Way to sweet to not link!
Amy: Her post today was a blast to the past! Funny!
Laura: She just did 100 questions! Great answers!
Smitty: I've sent some linky love to her before, go there and check her out!
Amy: Some fun times here! Take a gander!
The mombabe: Great Gal......go say hi from me!
Lisa: New girl and funny!
Grandy: She's still dandy!
Huckdoll: You haven't gone here yet....get your butt moving!
Kathryn: This is a new friend and she is super great! Does that make sense??? Super Great??? Oh well, my blog, my language! :-)
Mama Zen- Super dooper blog!
A football fanatic: My kinda blog!
Dona Mills: This blog is Greeeaaattt!
Dysfunctional: A must see!
If I forgot someone....just remember I'm a dipshit and forget things all the time! Don't feel bad! I'm working on a blogroll........and it's not fun!
You can head to these blogs even if you don't have a blog (Nickie....Stacey....Lynn!!! Do you hear me???? Get a B.L.O.G.!!!)
BTW....when the hell is blogspot going to fix spell check????


Amy said...

AHH, sweet linky link love! Thank you!

On the serious side - My mom sufferers from depression. She didn't go on med's until recently, which means I grew up with a mom who would often lock us outside for the day and do who knows what (we lived in the country, on 10 acres so it wasn't as dangerous for us as it sounds). I was angry at her because she was always pushing me away. I now know that she was depressed and lived a pathetic life where she couldn't enjoy anything. I wish she would of gone on meds all those years ago, my childhood would of been a much different experience.

Bravo to you for finding your drug :>) AND writing a post that encourages others to seek help.

lynard said...

webkinzs world rocks girl!!! i think craig and i need to buy our own and have our own accounts!!! nothing wrong with being a kid inside!!!! get out of your house and come over...we have things we need to talk about!! things we need to get ready to hand know things!! don't sit at home and have panic attacks!! opps...i threw landry's breakfast away and he is digging through the garbage to get it. YUCK!!! i guess it only won;t taste any different!!!

A Buns Life said...

Thanks for the linky love! I am so glad you are getting some meds and help! NOTHING wrong with mom should have done it a looooong time ago. My life would have been much better and different as a child as well. Maybe I wouldn't be so F'd up now. :) It will get better and YOU will feel better soon. xoxoxo.

We/I love the webkinz too. If Jake forgets to do his daily activities I will log in and do them for him and play a game or two of cash cow or some other fun game. :)

Lisa said...

You are so sweet. Thanks for the linky love.

ANd yes depression is difficult. Am so glad there are now drugs out there. If there had been, many generations of my mom's side would have been spared much heartbreak.

Oh and sometimes depression can be a symptom of a low thyroid. Experienced depression years ago myself. Found out later, my thyroid was not functioning...

OHmommy said...

Thanks for the link.

Did you say your husband wears your underpants? LOL

krissy said...

Nope....not bra! Okay it was for the costume party but it doesn't matter!

Hubby of course read the blog, and he thinks that he is cool now and everyone wants him! LOL! What a dork!!! He said:
"ask them, I bet they want me!"

Now he is hovering above me to see what I'm writting about and yelling
"oh they so want me" (they meaning you and everyone else)

See...see why he either cracks me up or pushes me to drink more!!!!!

Nickie said...

Glad you had the courage to blog about your mental health issues. So many people try to do it alone and it makes things worse. People really do need support and sometimes a really big push to seek help.

On a lighter note--still your bloggie follower and not a bloggie leader!!

♥♥♥ A- Licious ♥♥♥ said...

oh wow....what a great posting!
great information and just good stuff! i know all about depression...maybe i will share about it one day ;o)

love your style - love your writing! i will soooooo be back mama!

;o) ((hug))

a-licious xoxoxox

jess said...

awwwwwwwwwwww i'm feeling the LOVE.

thanks SO MUCH!

Huckdoll said...

Thanks for the link love! Hey, I really like hearing about your anxiety and panic attacks as I've gone through the same thing.

I think mine were due to years of chemical drug use and after I quit, anything that got my heart racing again ie. a cigarette, caffeine, a scary movie, an Advil - it could send me into a panic attack. Gah! I hate even thinking about how sensitive I was!

Anyhoo, keep up the serious too...a lil serious is a good thing!

FUN-ky Mama said...

Thanks for the linky love! I'm going to check out the others you mentioned to, well those who I don't already read all the time! =D
I totally get ya on the depression/anxiety thing. Effexor is my friend!!
Oh yeah, and my hubby plays Webkinz, too!

The MomBabe said...

Ooh, I just ♥ being on people's blogroll. Thanks and kisses.

Plus, I am proud to say I am medicated. (Do you even want to know the kind of scary person I am without it? didn't think so.)

Amy said...

Thanks for the linky love girl!
My mom was depressed and is on medication. It really is amazing the difference it makes. I have a few friends who have to as well. They always ask me how do I cope with the four of them and life? Well I just drink ;) Plus I'm Greek, I don't hold anything in! I commend you for being strong enough to find the help you need. Often our pride gets in the way. Okay enough about that...
Your husband, must seek some help of his own! Webkinz?!? C'mon now! My daughters are hopelessly addicted to that site. But I think maybe it's time to get that man a Wii!

Grandy said...

You're not a dipshit (as you stated) but a beautiful person. Thanks for sharing what you go through, and although what I suffer is in a milder form, I can only imagine. I hope the new things Nickie has suggested can help!!!