So what did I do this weekend???
Friday: Took Diva to my parents house to spend some time with them and to allow her mother (ME!) to restore some patience and sanity! My friend Lynard went with me! Anyway, long story short......we stopped in a Walgreens to empty our bladders. Inside the public "disasterous-disguisting-nasty" bathroom was a older lady mumbling to herself. Okay, I talk to myself often so I concentrate more on getting my spanx down and not peeing myself! I wait for Lynard to be done and at this time the lady comes out of the stall. She proceeds to tell us that today she ate broccoli and carrots for lunch and it makes her shit herself (she went into gross out details). Lynard and I giggle to amuse her and Lynard pushes me out the door! Then on our way home we run into fog! Really thick fog! I was passing a vehicle and there was a truck in front of the car I'm passing. This redneck decides to stop suddenly, turn in front of me so he can do a U-turn! Okay people.....our speed limit is 75miles and hour! Naturally I was doing 80! I screamed obsenities that deserved a mouthful of soap! I also do the motherly reaction and extend my arm in front of Lynard! Let's just say that if we were in an accident....her left boob would have been safe!!!
Saturday: Sat around and picked my butt all day! It was freezing ass cold out people! So cold your nostrils stick together and any snot freezes instantly! Sucks the big weiner I tell ya! I Hate Winter!!! AHHHHHHHH!
Sunday: It's still freezing but whatever. Meet my parents to eat lunch and then we all head to the skating rink! We (we being the PTO) decided to try to get all of the school district involved with a fun event! It worked! Over 150 people from our town! Awesome! What wasn't so awesome is my beautiful niece put her skates between mine while I was trying to help her. Note: I suck at skating anyway! So, both of us go down like big piles of goo! I proceed to push her up and then try to get my rump up too! This doesn't go so well. I end up falling on my ass again and my niece dropped on top of me again! Okay...round 2.......same thing! People....it took me 4 attempts! Thank God for the extra padding on my keister but damn......my ass hurts!!!! And might I add how flipping hard it is to try to hold up 2 + children!!!! Good Gracious.....I finally escorted them to the wall and told them to fend for themselves. They were like leeches!!!
Anyway, I have muscles in my body that hurt like hell right now and are on fire! I'm such a freaking wuss!!!! And I'm a wuss that is totally out of shape. You want to know what's worse??? My 60yr old father was skating circles around me! I tried tripping him but that old man was just way too fast!!!! Next time my friends.....Next time!!!! Vengance will be mine!!!
So, that was my weekend! I'm going to take a bottle of Tylenol PM and maybe go soak my body in hopes of some relief. I don't even want to think about tomorrow. Ouch......
Did anyone else watch Extreme Home Make Over tonight??? Man, that was a tear jerker!
What a cheeser! This is something my hubby would do!