Monday, January 28, 2008

The good....The bad.....The boobies!

Top 10 reasons having big boobs rock!

10. You can make your hubby swoon just by taking off your bra!

9. You can get the attention of the mechanic who is trying to screw you over on your bill. A little more cleavage, a little more flirting, a little more provocative and poof....you get your way!

8. Your baby would never go hungry and you could probably feed a daycare if need be!

7. If someone asks for directions on a cold winters day and you don't want to take your hands out of your pockets to point the direction, you could use your boobs like "The big Boobed lady" in the "Simpson Movie". (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DvDOr4_nzIo)

6. If someone pisses you off, just nip out and you could take out their eye in vengeance!

5. You will always get some sort of attention from your boobies at the bar!

4. You can complain to your hubby that your back hurts from carrying around your monstrous boobs all the time and there is no way you can finish the laundry today!

3. If you come upon a car accident and are a good citizen, you can always use your boobs as a neck brace and save the person from being paralyzed!

2. You can play the drums on your own titties!

1. You can draw your name in the sand at a beach by just taking off your bra!

Top 10 reasons Big Boobs suck!

10. Victoria Secrets is your own personal hell because nothing from that store ever fits correctly!

9. Ugly, drunk guys find big breasts as an invitation to talk to you and fondle you!

8. Cute shirts are a fantasy and pretty bras are a dream!

7. The act like a bib and all food is magnetically attracted to your whoppers!

6. Upon taking off your bra, a small buffet of food falls out!

5. New babies lips are instantly attracted to your girls even though they have been dried up for years!

4. No one takes you seriously, especially if you are blond.

3. You can lose weight but your heifers always makes you look bigger!

2. Somehow when eating, your boobs always touch the plate and you always have a stain on your shirt (usually where the nipples are located)

1. You hubby likes to play the "bongo's" on your feeders!

Don't forget to check out my award below and go give some Internet love to these sassy girls:

http://www.sleepingmommy.com/
http://www.huckdoll.blogspot.com/
http://www.momof4girls.blogspot.com/
http://www.momisodes.com/
http://www.amysbratpack.blogspot.com/


In case you needed to know!






















This pic may be disturbing! Sorry!

*note* This is NOT me!!!


















One more thing....Please leave me a comment! Amanda, you sweet thing you....we need to party more often and Nickie is the comment Queen. Now, you two run your sweet asses out and make a BLOG!

13 comments:

OHmommy said...

Glad, I read the cpatin under that last picture. I was about to gasp "She so didn;t go there!"

Nice list.

swampy said...

I wouldn't know...my 32 Long bra fits me just fine.
That picture is scary. I just skipped lunch. Thanks.
As for the "Psycho" "hat"...you would have to negotiate with the Navy pilot whose head I removed it...from.
(Ending a sentence with a presposition?)

Sandy C. said...

OMG!!! ROFL at "you can always use your boobs as a neck brace and save the person from being paralyzed!" Thats is hilarious!...thanks so much for the chuckle and the LINKY LOVE! You rawk :) I'm running to add you to my blogroll.

And BTW, I can't relate to any of this. After 16 months of breastfeeding, I only have bee stings :( *sobs*

retardedrugrat said...

Lmao! Awesome post! I read my way through those lists laughing so hard I almost fell off my chair LOL.

Thanks too for leaving a comment over at my place :)

A Buns Life said...

Wow. What a post for a first time visitor! :) I myself caved and had to get rid of the girls surgically. I am 5'1 and when I was 20 years old had so much back pain and numbness from them (they were size DD-E)that it really wasn't a choice. Now after two kiddos, they are pathetic little sacs and I wouldn't mind having small implants put in. Go figure.

Nickie said...

Oh, yeah baby! Big boobs rule! I have them, I love them and just as importantly, hubby loves them :)
The list is hysterical, and I could relate to several of the comments, therefore had to laugh at myself!! That pic is truly scary, but I suppose the woman earns a shout out for her
??bravery?? As for the uses of the titty twins, there are many--one of my personal faves is as a drink holder (bottles especially) OR any other long cylindrical object (hee, hee, hee)!!!!!!!!!!!

Miss said...

So many wonderful references to the twins, I just dont know what to do!!! LMAO

Huckdoll said...

That was hilarious, awesome job on that post! And much thanks for the link recognition!

Grandy said...

Um...Note to SELF...Don't read Cracka's blog from WORK!!! I saw that pic and quickly shut it down. Had to come back and chuckle tonight. Shhhhh..don't tell!!

girlymom said...

Ewwww! That pic is what I am going to look like after all these children finish with me! You have a great sense of humor~ Love it!

Thanks for sending some blog love my way~ it's very kind of you!

tattooed mama said...

i can't believe you left out pillows! good or bad, you choose

Smitty76 said...

You SO nailed it, the joys and HORRORS of having big boobies! LOL

Anonymous said...

I told you never to show that picture to anyone!! That was done during one of our stupid drunken stages!!! I think tomorrow we should go to Victoria Secrets and try to try on bras!!! See if we can find one to squeeze the Hardy Boys into!!! I will be using the girls as a distraction soon...you know what I mean sister??