Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Sexy, Sex, Sex.......be prepared on this one my friends!

You may walk away now! Go on, it won't hurt my feelings. But this post is not for your typical prudes. You've been warned.

My goal is to give each and every couple something to add to their sex life. I just want you to face the facts. Your sex life could always use some sort of boost. Right? Is it always in the same position, the same place, the same blah, boring, so not orgasm way? Then take a dive into the world of Krissy's Sex Talk. You can do this. I promise. I don't care if you have kids, I don't care if you are exhausted. You can still give something to your relationship. You owe it to the both of you. And if you are a single person. The toys are your safest orgasm that you will ever get. No, you don't get the emotion with it, but you can name him and it may give you a better connection to your dildo/vibrator.

But I do focus on relationships. Why? Because I am in a relationship and I need the excitement as much as you do. Don't get me wrong. I do tell my husband "no" sometimes. But not a lot. So, ready to get your feet wet?

So, you wanna knock your partners socks off? You want to knock them off so hard that they actually fold themselves? How about this........Porn! Yep, good ole fashion raunchy, nasty porn. Watch for a while (at least 5 minutes) and then start fondling, playing, fore playing with your mate. Soon, you will be having just as much fun as the paid porn freaks but without the worries of disease. Consider it. It will get you hot and horny or you will laugh out loud. Either way, go into it with the intentions of having sex with the porn stars. Stop gasping, it isn't unheard of you know!

Simon Says: you know the game. You've played it as a kid. Now play it with your mate. "Simon Says to follow me to the bedroom!" "Simon says to lick like this!" You get the point. Make it into a fun adventure instead of "So, you wanna have sex?" "Yeah, I guess so, just hurry up...I'm tired. Hmmmmm.....no brainer.

The balls: Do you know that these are just as enticing to play with then the actual shaft? No, to squeeze them like your testing for fresh fruit. But, gently play, gently caress or gently poke in between the two sacks. This is best used for foreplay. Obviously. But if you are flexible and you can reach around and play while having intercourse, it will be very enjoyable for him. Just watch the hair, don't pluck one out because he will not.enjoy.that! Actually, he should be shaving the balls anyway because it does make the shaft look larger. Just a tid bit of info.

Communication in the bedroom. Don't just moan and groan people. Tell him what you like. Tell him where it feels good. Tell him if it hurts a bit. He won't know unless you open your mouth. You would be dumbfounded at how many married couples don't communicate in bed. Hell with that. If I don't like it.......he won't do it again. Case closed. And there is always the talking dirty too. This could possibly be the biggest turn on for you and your mate. Try this while watching the porno. Instant orgasm.

And the last thing for today is very crucial. Different positions. Different places. Different everything. Don't just do it in the bed. I have said it before and I will say it again. Take it outdoors when the neighbors are sleeping and the kids are snoozing. Be a rebel. You.Can.Do.This.

As always, make it safe if you are not happily married. Condoms or oozing sores. Take your pick. And always lube. Always. I will not tell you this enough. Lube or hurt later in life. Your choice. This isn't coming from me....this is coming from numerous doctors. Lube, Lube, Lube. If you need suggestions...my email has changed to sdiver1973@unitelsd.com

I am also going to have a guest blogger on here. My sex driven husband will tell you why guys need this. He will be blunt and honest like his crude wife. More to come later you little sex queens. And let me know if you tried any of these. You don't need to give me details. Just a yes or no. Either in comments or email.....I don't care. But I am wanting to save the world, one orgasm at a time. Remember? I need to know I helped.

Next topic will be on toys! Yummy, good for the orgasm toys!

10 comments:

Queen of the Mayhem said...

You are too much! I agree that a healthy sex life is crucial to a good relationship. Guys just need that to feel close to a girl....and vice versa.

I also like the weekend getaway sex-a-thon! Leave the kids and your stress at home and BE ALONE with your mate!

Momisodes said...

"No, to squeeze them like your testing for fresh fruit."- sorry, but I nearly peed my pants reading that! :)

Simon says huh? That's a new one for me! :)

Maude Lynn said...

"Saving the world one orgasm at a time!" Girl, you have got to put that on your header!

Crunchy Green Mom - Suzanne said...

I must say... just from experience (when I was 19, I'm 34 now)...

Balls.. don't switch in the sack. *shrugs*
I'm sure my ex really really wish I'd know that when I was 19.

*smiles*

Putting the FUN in DysFUNctional said...

Dang, I know more about sex than I thought! Because we do all of that.
And more. ;o)

Unknown said...

Porn is GOOD! Good porn is good, chose carefully.

Sex in the shower is GOOD and a two birds with one stone deal :)

Sex in the marital bed is lame-o! Get creative...

Thanks for that Krissykins!

Anonymous said...

Nothing wrong with a little porn to get things started. And guys, keeping the boys smooth is a good thing. It'll get 'em a bit more play time. ;)

Anonymous said...

I must be a sexual goddess...none of this is new to me (except maybe the simon says) LOL. Which I shall now be trying out tonight. Heh.

I agree 100% that communication is SO VERY important in (and out!) of the bedroom. How ELSE can someone know that you like, or don't like, something? I'm definitely not afraid to say it like it is! LOL

Tara R. said...

You are a hoot! I saw Sam Kinison in concert once, he was talking about how the ABCs can be very erotic... think about it, using your tongue as your writing 'tool.' Now you know why I love to read... hmmmm, learning all those long words.

Anonymous said...

That is all GREAT advice. Hey we would still LOVE to have you as a guest blogger on our site. Hope to see ya soon.