Out of the mouth of MY babe....

How is it that kids know just what to say? Especially when you need it the most. I'm seriously the proud mother of a very sensitive, very sweet daughter.

Diva: "Mom, did you know that you are by far the coolest mom EVER?"

Me: "Thank you Stink, but I'm outta checks so you will get nothing more!"

Diva: "I don't want anything else, except another Webkinz, but that isn't why I told you that. I told you that because all my friends want you as a mom!"

Me: "I am not getting you another Webkinz. You just got one plus I just sold a kidney to buy stuff from your schools fundraiser. And Christmas is coming. But I'm glad your friends like me."

Diva: "Your a ROCKSTAR!!"

Me: "As are you sweetkins!"

note: I am sick to death of school fundraisers. I paid over $20 for a stupid little silicone thingy-ma-jig. R.I.D.I.C.U.L.O.U.S.

Earlier today Diva and her friend came rushing into the house.

Diva: "Mom...Mom....MOOOMMMM! I am going to be in a commercial. You know so-and-so's dad? Well, he asked for me to be in a commercial. I think it is because I am hot!"

Friend: "Hey...ME TOO! I'm hot too. And I am going to be in the commercial. Can you sign the release form for me?"

Me: "Diva. Stop being conceited. Friend. No. Your actual mom has to do that. You know her. The one that birthed you. She has to do it. And who the hell just asked you to be in a commercial and if it was a stranger I am going to beat your butts!"

Diva: "You know him. He gave me a card to give you. You are supposed to call him."

Friend: "Well....can you at least call my real mother?"

For the record, the story jived and I actually do know the dad and he is very cool and so not a molester or a child thief. And I did call friends real mom and she is going to be in the commercial too. A local commercial of course. We are not that damn cool.

I love being a mom. To my real daughter and to the numerous adopted children that have staked claim to me.

Note: I don't always look this shitty. And please ignore the fillings in my mouth. And Diva is now self conscious because she has a "Twisted Sister" tongue. Ha!

Extra note: I love you people. The comments and of course, the emails. I love you people. And to my sweet friends whom called me today to tell me to settle down, you are my life lines. Mwah!