Whatcha gotta say about this??????

Oh my goodness. I am shocked to say the least. I have been told by many poor saps that they are completely jealous of my husband. Why??? Because his wife (me.) likes sex and likes sex to be exciting and new. Not the same old routine of getting into bed, taking off your own clothes, discussing who will be on top this time, and then sleeping in less then 5minutes.

So I wonder what people would say if I told them that I tell my husband "no" sometimes too? I admit...it isn't often. But I do tell him "no!" I do get "Headache's" sometimes and I do miss having my period because it was a good excuse to have some peace.

Now granted. I am also the wife that has sex on a country dirt road in the backseat of the car and I have had sex on the slide in our backyard and I have had raunchy sex in the rain. Oh shut up....you know you have too. Your just too shy to admit it.

But I don't always give in. I do like sex. I do like orgasms. I don't fake it....no reason too when you know what you are doing. This means get your ass to Partygals and get a damn toy or some Love Potion #9 so you can also have some orgasms. Just saying. You can be me too.

But this jealousy comment makes me laugh. I never fancied myself as a person that someone else would be jealous of. Me??? Are you kidding? I don't have the brand new cars or the high dollar house or the expensive as shit wardrobe. I am the one who paid off her cars and swore that I would have my uterus back in my body before I ever have another new car payment. That sucks. I don't need the super big ass house that cost over $1000 a month because I want a modest house so my money could be spent on fun things. I don't have the Armani wardrobe because I shop at clearance racks at Target or second hand shops. I have designer labels but I guarantee I did not pay full price for them or I am the proud second owner for the designer jeans. I am determined to pay off all our bills so we have money to blow. That is my 10yr plan. This is nothing to be jealous of.

So I was oddly proud to be a person of envy. Well, actually, my husband is the envied one and I am the one who looks like the SuperWife of the year. I kinda like that. I admit. I would much rather someone be jealous of me because I have a ass that you could bounce a dime off of and not an ass that has fat dimples, but I will take what I can get.

Now I am going to go tell my husband that he is the luckiest man alive and for that, he better buy me something damn good and not something off the clearance rack. Actually, I would take the DVD set of Ghost Whisperer which I just realized after reading this that I am a complete utter retard.

Goodbye.