How to screw with your kid.....

Tell them you are going on a "camping adventure." Don't answer specific questions like "Do I get to miss school?" Skate around questions like we always do as parents anyway. No??? Okay, it's just me but whatever! Moving on!

Jump in the car fast. Go to your local sporting goods store. Once you are there, find the camping equipment. They will most likely think that you are shopping.

Take pictures. Pictures sorta seal the deal here. You'll know why in a minute.

Then go home. Without purchasing anything. And then drop the bomb. "That was a camping adventure. What? You didn't have fun? Sorry. I thought you would be happy. Gee, I guess I won't do anything special for you ever again." And when you get home...show them the pictures for proof of your "camping adventure!"

Or you could tell them that you are going on a trip that has rides. Get them excited. They will think you are going to Disney World or some place fun.

Then take them to the mall and put them on the merry go round ride. This is really messing with their heads.

Don't feel bad about this. They mess with your head all.the.time. They will use guilt, tears, smiles, "I love Yous" and the worst........their puppy dog eyes. They are tyrants. They know that they should be grounded for putting your favorite shoes in the toilet (yes...my daughter did this!) but they turn on the waterworks and suddenly, they are free. They have no conscious. It is time for us to get even.

Hello???? Is this thing on???? *tap, tap*

Am I alone on this?????