Friday, May 8, 2009

What's a Cracker like me been doing???

Well first and foremost, I am dwelling in self pity as I realize that I have become a official blogger drop out. And that I can claim this site as DOA (dead on arrival.)

However, as much as I have considered just closing it down, I cannot force myself to do so. Because I don't like failing, even though I should be used to it by now. And secondly, I like to come here and vent my anger. Better here then towards my family, I say.

I have been busy and busy is good for a nerd like myself. I have been........

  • Doing some partygal parties. Nothing much. Just as favors to my sex addicted friends whom need that extra thrill in their lives. Buzz.Buzz.
  • Taking ownership of this house again and punished it with some serious spring cleaning. The garage now harbors a boat, car and motorcycle instead of trash, mice and things that should have been deemed "toxic."
  • Whooping it up with friends and family.
  • Drinking a lot of wine. What??? It's good for the heart. Don't judge me.
  • Cussing out a Priest while exhibiting some of my nasty road rage. I have re-taught myself some prayers and begged for forgiveness.
  • Spanked my husband. Just checking to see if anyone is listening.
  • Spanked the dogs because they are holy terrors.
  • Doing some remodeling in the house. I am the proud owner of new stainless steel appliances in which I adore.
  • Flirting with salesmen to get some descent discounts for said appliances.
  • One of the salesmen got violently ill from my said flirting.
  • Yard work. Well some until I got pissy and just called a lawn care company to control the raging weeds in my yard.
  • Had a vicious cold and therefore convinced myself that I did indeed have the swine flu. After all, I have been pigging out lately. Oink.Oink.
  • Banned any sex with my husband because he wasn't cleaning the proper way while I fought off the swine flu.
  • Convinced my daughter to pick up all the dog piles outdoors. This worked until I realized she threw all the dog crap in the neighbors yards. And for a side note. I cannot stand these neighbors.
  • Been on a few road trips but nothing to write home about.
  • Had approximately 400 temper tantrums about home improvements trumping vacations.
  • Threatened to burn the house down about 500X's.
  • Played computer games instead of doing laundry.
  • Guests have been ravishing our home lately.
  • 4 trillion pounds of homework.
  • Texting until my fingers bled.
  • Singing karaoke.
  • badly
  • Behaved like a toddler.
  • Wet my pants a billion times from sneezing.
  • Definitely have had some serious ADHD.

The End.

7 comments:

Kel said...

Oh how I've missed your crazy antics...(ok, so not really cuz I harass you facebook style) but it is nice to see you around these parts again! :)
~K

Kat said...

Sounds like the same old, same old to me. ;)
Glad to see you back. :)

Tara R. said...

I've missed your snarkiness too. Great rant though.

That whole cussing the priest out thing... that's intriguing. Glad to see you've survived the swine flu.

Don't be a stranger.

Huckdoll said...

Never utter the words "consider just closing it down" ever again or I will hunt you down and slap you!! You're an amazing part of this blogosphere...your humour and heart - even if just once in a blue moon - is much need. You have the ability to brighten the darkest of days Ms. Krissykins xoxo

Happy Mother's Day, my dear.

sltbee69 said...

I was about to send out an APB on you! I've missed you and I hope you don't close it down indefinitely.

Patois said...

Up to the same stuff as usual, then? Glad you avoided swine flu.

DysFUNctional Mom said...

I'm glad you're not closing down!